Pioneer

image
photo of and by HS

I abandoned all gods.
I could not afford the sacrifice.
I abnegated all thorny “shoulds” and took detours when faced with crosses.
Let me be free, but not so free
That I become entirely unbound and unmoored,
Untethered from all familiar archetypes,
Lost on a blank page, no line to build upon.
For there I have no peg on which to rest my cloak.
No story in which to find a home.
I can not seem to surrender to
A thought system forged by humans.
There is always error there.
I can not relax.
I am always looking for the faults in the theories, the cracks in logic
I know I will slip through and
Fall into pain.
Must I design the architecture of my beliefs from my own imagination?
From air?
From atoms?

From scratch?

Or

Is my comfort to be a patchwork reality?
Hand sewn fragments of dismembered theories, an unnatural religion?
A Frankenstein?

Can peace be found in mismatched pieces?
What I inherited I do not want.
What I learned I can not trust.
What I saw I can not understand.
I wander, my mind disjointed;

Blind men touching the elephant of consciousness.

HS

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9 thoughts on “Pioneer

  1. I can’t choose some lines, because I loved the entire flow of the poem! But I will say that having read the last line I was blown away 💕

    Also I would like to welcome you to the world of WordPress and I am barely 3 months into this whole blogging journey myself. So, I would be happy to engage in some stimulating conversations with you for sure! And now that you’ve joined WordPress, you’re a part of a global community which is quite large I assure you! 😉👍 Relax and don’t be afraid to ask anything, I’d be happy to help. Cheers 😊💕

    Like

    1. YAY! I am new to this as well :). I have been a poet since I was literally in 1st grade although I really think all of us are poets – some of us just put it into writing while others sculpt their poetry in clay, or glass, film, or simply through living. I am so excited to have a platform to share it with other writers!!!

      The last line of a poem or an article seems very important to me so I am glad you enjoyed the last line of Pioneer. I went to your site and I so enjoy how you have chosen to display your work! I am still trying to figure out how to make my blog attractive and you NAILED IT!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thanks for dropping by and I am happy to hear that you think my blog looks pretty! 😂👍

        Just look through some themes, try out a few and see what works for you. I tried a couple and settled for my current one because I personally liked it a lot! Go with your gut instinct, it will lead you the right way I’m sure 😉

        Also, a poet since 1st grade you say? Wow. I’m impressed! You knew your skills right from the start! Now that’s really amazing, because in 1st grade I was busy colouring elephants orange. 😂😂😂 ( I remember that because my mother has still kept my 1st grade art exam sheet where I coloured an elephant orange because I had no grey crayon 😛😂)

        My name is Advaita by the way but you can call me Addy or just A! 😁😉👍👍

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      2. AH!! Addy!! My Super Secret Pseudonym is Adelaine Dare :). A slight take off of my real name which is Heidi :). And I think an orange elephant sounds amazing :).

        I don’t know that I was terribly skilled as a first grader. I was just charmed by words and how you could shuffle them together, rearrange them to make a reflection of reality as I experienced it. I am a sucker for alliteration, metaphor, and simile. I sometimes get stuck in the style of writing that is coziest to me which is why being exposed to other writers is such a gift. I see what the rest of you write, both topically and stylistically and it’s like being handed a new, mutable toy.

        Thank you for the warm welcome :). I love any feedback I get and I will follow you and provide love and encouragement too :).

        Too all the orange elephants (raising a glass),

        Heidi

        Liked by 1 person

      3. 😂 Wow, nice to meet you Heidi! I always wanted to be friends with a girl named Heidi (I loved the book and the animated series I saw on tv as a kid) 😁👍

        I too hope to learn and evolve as a person and poet thanks to all the wonderful people out here. I’m happy to have found you and your blog. 😊💕

        So, (I too raise a glass) to all the orange elephants and swiss cheese (your name reminds me of it somehow) 😁👍👍

        Like

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